My Crazy Thoughts

I responded to a call for a job interview sometime back. This was a written interview. The questions you get are interesting. Questions like how often do you lose your temper and when was the last time you lost it and what did you do? I never lose my temper! (but one incident where I had to argue with my boss comes to mind). And then there is my favourite one, where you are asked to narrate an incident when you were faced with a challenge and how you overcame it.

Really, do I face challenges? SURE but for me there are only minor and I cannot even quickly recall one. Obviously what comes into mind are catch 22 situations but I have discovered that the minute it is gone, it becomes so petty.

I believe this happens because I have been able to overcome the biggest challenge in my life. This is what I regard as victory over oneself. For those who know me back in the days will agree that I am a reserved, shy person. When I look back, I see how much I have lost because of such a personality. If I never decided to deal with this I would not have been here today. I would not have been writing this piece today.

Taking responsibility was a no go area for me. It took one moment to change that. Again it was not a big thing but it changed my view on life. This dates back to high school when I took the decision to join a public speaking competition, and I had to represent my school! I still remember my friend Bonga who asked me "Do you really wanna do this?" and he encouraged me (he had represented the school in this competition before). Thank you boy!

Although I did not win but I know I made an impression. Since then, I discovered which route to take for my career. I decided I wanted to be a broadcaster. I was and still an avid radio listener. I did Journalism at university, majoring in broadcasting.  I still recall comments like 'why do you do this being such an introvert?'  The interesting part is that my colleagues in the field thought of me as an extrovert.

Coming out of the closet has not been so easy. Even today I still find myself in that closet. There are forces that drive you that way. That is when your personality is put through a litmus test. One thing I am happy about is that such challenges have taught me to be strong, to believe in myself, to believe in what I am doing, to be determined to achieve what I want and to be stubborn (unfortunately).

I will go back again. When it was time for me to go to varsity, I wanted to do journalism and this was met with big frowns. Most argued that it is not a good paying profession especially in Swaziland. Damn! what is important for me is an environment where I will be happy with what I do (self satisfaction) and money is secondary. Probably I will never get rich! I insisted on my choice. Although my parents were reticent at first, but they eventually accepted.

I was rejected for my first choice and I ended up 'wasting' a year studying Social Science. Ask me, I will tell you about the pain of doing something you do not like. I obtained the worst results of my educational experience, although I managed to get a proceed. I applied for a change of course and they allowed me. I enjoyed my varsity after which point. I graduated in 2005 with my diploma (Poor me!).

Everybody, including yourself, expect that you jump from varsity to employment. This is not always the case. There are a few options where I could be suitably employed with my qualification and I was looking in one  of the media houses. Obviously with my love for radio SBIS (the national radio) was my number one priority. I would not like to delve much on this one.

Knowing what I want, I have been so discriminating. I turned down to opportunities in the process. This never went down well with the people surrounding me. I have been pressured to take up other professions such as teaching. I stood my ground. Today I feel proud that I am an architect of my own destiny. I am where I am because I have had to make a few sacrifices. I am happy at the moment and I see a brighter future. Although I have slightly diverted from my initial career, I am still on track. I see my career in a different light. I have survived! 

The End.